Just watched Nandito Ako (in two days) and I really like it. The song is really emotional and this is the best video which has translation and nice pictures (haha); the only bad thing is that it's live and there're fans cheering in the background. The studio version is of course more heartfelt. But still, great song by David Archuleta :) #DA2014!
Clocking in a post for 1 Jan 2012 although I have nothing much to say. I guess I'm supposed to list down my aspirations and resolutions for the year ahead, but there's not much point, really. After all, no one really knows whether you stick to them or not. It's between God and me, so I'll keep it in my heart :)
Anyway I just want to start the year off with the verses that inspire me a lot. There are many in the Bible of course, but these are those that I confess by mouth and always remember, cos when I claim them I just feel a sense of peace. It's hard to describe, but such is a relationship with God. Indescribably peaceful and joyful :)
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4:6-7
My favourite verse since primary school and I say this before exams, when I'm jittery, basically any time when I need peace (all the time, really). And trust me (even if you don't, trust God above all), it works.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose."
- Romans 8:28
This is good for the times where God puts you in a situation you don't think you can handle, or you dislike. Before you start to question God's plans for your life, remember that He's putting you through everything for His purpose, because He loves you. And there is always Hope in Him.
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." "
- Jeremiah 29:11
This is such an awesome promise from God. It ties in with Romans 8:28 as well! So if you think you're going through life in the dark, remember that the brightest Light is with you, and He can see every single step in front of you before you even take it. How brilliant is that? You can't fall, you can't get hurt, because He promises prosperity and not harm, hope and not despair :)
"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
- Isaiah 40:31
AHS' school verse! And over the four years there I've learnt to really appreciate it. I like the fact that it's in the hall so when we take major exams I can look at it, confess it, and calm myself down. It reminds us that God always grants us strength to face any challenge. We are weak alone, but as long as we hope and trust in Him, we are strong. Oh what joy we have in Him :)
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
- 2 Timothy 1:7
Clarissa introduced this verse to me in 2010 I think. And it has stuck with me since then. It gives me courage in times of worry. Fear is the devil's trap. We don't need to fall into it, because God has given us His Holy Spirit to conquer that trap (and all the others of the world) :D
And of course, there's Psalm 23, which I'm trying to memorise fully. I admit I like to mix the different versions together so it's a mix of KJV, NLT, NIV and all but at the end of the day, it is the Word of God, and it's power remains equally brilliant. The KJV one is nice, but the 'thou's and -eths are quite unfamiliar. So I'll just type out the one I remember, which is a mix.
The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures: he leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul: He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His Name's sake.
Yes, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.
King David was a man after God's heart. As Christians today, what is our purpose? What do we seek? We ought to seek God first, because without Him our life is a purposeless.
In 2011 I learnt to confess the Lord's Prayer and Jabez' Prayer daily in the morning before the day starts, because I believe it opens our hearts to receive His blessings, at the same time let Him take control of our lives. And it has changed me - it has made me less paranoid and controlling, and more humble and submissive.
So this is the end of the beginning. It only gets better from here :)
So this is the beginning of the end. The end of 2011, that is.
This year is going to be a little different, because I'm going off to Changi Village to countdown with my relatives later, so I can't post this at 2359. Well anyway it doesn't really matter because the end of 2011 may be a milestone for all of us, but it is simply a day in the grand scheme of things. God's blessings will continue to flow abundantly, and I believe He has greater things in store for us in the many years ahead :)
So I just want to start by saying that I have survived this year and even enjoyed it, through God's grace alone. I would never have survived those trying periods during exams, PW and mood swings had it not been for His unfailing Love. Yes, I admit there were many times I failed to understand His plans and I questioned His motives, and for that I am deeply sorry. At the end of the day, when I look back at my childish worries and fears, I realise that God's Love encompasses them all. As in 1 Peter 5:7,
"Cast all your cares upon Him, for He careth for you." (KJV)
And Scott Wesley Brown's song, He Will Carry You, so aptly put it:
There is no problem too big God cannot solve it
There is no mountain too tall He cannot move it
There is no storm too dark God cannot calm it
There is no sorrow too deep He cannot soothe it
If He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders
I know my brother that He will carry you
If He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders
I know my sister that He will carry you
I like this song because it really reminds me that through all the problems and troubles, there's one person that never fails us: Jesus. He carried all our sin, all our pain, what more our little worries?
I want to thank God as well for all the prayers He heard, all my cries of desperation, all my tears. He heard them all, and He delivered me from the darkest depths. Okay it may sound rather exaggerated, and perhaps if you knew what challenges I faced, you might scoff and say that they could be easily overcome; however to me, there were many times I felt like giving up, many times I felt torn in making decisions. Yet I prayed, and God answered. Indeed, He was my only Hope. And I really must thank God for giving me the faith, no matter how little, to cling on to Him. To face the cross, and put the world behind me.
And now I really pray that with what little faith we have, we can continue to grow in the Lord. This faith can grow, like how a mustard seed grows into a huge tree that provides shade. Likewise, our faith grows from something so small, into a tree that is strong, that bears good fruit, that helps others, strengthens others and ultimately, bring others to Christ. Oh the joy we have in the Lord :)
Since I don't have the luxury of time to go into detail of every challenge that I faced (not that I wish to, or even remember them anyway), I shall move on to the part where I list down all the fun and enjoyable times I had in 2011. If I forget anything important, please tell me (whoever who actually reads this)!
2011:
1) 7 Jan: AHS Sec 4 batch of '10 PROM! :D And the Pinnacle with Lindy, Dexter and YH after that.
2) 7 Jan: I got a belated birthday gift :)
3) 10 Jan: O Level Results Day. God's plan for me unfolded, no regrets!
4) 13 - 15 Jan: Vietnam Trip (HCM) with my dad, Val, Dave and YH :) haha the foot massage, Cu Chi Tunnels, the seafood dinner, the manicure and shopping was fun!
5) 24 Jan: Vivo to celebrate YH's birthday at Sushi Tei, and to prepare Jacq's farewell stuff at B&J's.
6) 25 Jan: Sent of Jacq to Aus! :(
7) 26 Jan: Posting day, went to appeal to V just for the sake of appealing hahaha. Then SAF Yacht Club with Mary and YH and my dad.
8) 27 Jan - 8 Feb: CHAPTER 11 (Orientation) :D
9) 5 Feb: CNY celebration, and Bella joined us for the first time hahaha.
10) 11 Feb: CG Bonding Day at Geylang Serai. Then I fell sick :(
11) 14 Feb: Valentine's Day. Sick at home haha. Received sweet messages though :)
12) CG 04/11! Pleasantly surprised to know that Jo was in the same class as me. Rojak class ftw :)
13) 12 March: Sunset was beautiful.
14) 14 March: lak lao :P
15) 18 March: In The Highest Live Worship at Woodlands! Amazing praise and worship :)
16) 23 March: AHS Founder's Day aka 4D reunion!
17) 26 March: PSRP
18) 2 April: Someone's dengue :(
19) 13 May: TJChoir Wild Thinks Concert and the post-concert debate
20) Pre-U Sem 2011 (1st week of June)! TJ hosted and it was great fun being an SPF to Group 12. Met cool people there, and caught up with old friends like Pris!
21) 6 June: Switzerland, Austria & Czech Republic trip! :D FANTASTIC SUMMER, beautiful scenery, great food and especially the dessert.
22) JCTs LOL. Learning experience. God's grace alone, really.
23) F1 race just before Promos haha.
24) Malacca trip during Sept hols, lovely beach and resort :)
25) Promos. THANK YOU LORD.
26) Second. God's grace alone.
27) TIP at St Luke's Hospital (Nov-Dec), made new friends and colleagues. Learning experience indeed :)
28) OGL interview was crazy madness and embarrassing but God saw me through :)
29) Sports Enrichment thingy, rollerblading with Christy and Van and even swaveboarding with YY hahaha!
30) Bintan in Dec with family and Lydon, rocky ferries, jokes, buggies and nice sandcastle making.
31) IFC Exco '11/12.
32) LEO DSC 27-28 Dec!
33) Entry test for SRP and after that :)
34) Bio O training.
35) 22 April, Good Friday. God loves you, and we are blessed :)
36) Recess buddies, under the staircase people (Y)
37) Jap curry addicts!
38) Meeting Mr. Seng and enjoying his craziness.
39) PS3 and Rockband!
40) 22-23 Dec: Christmas gathering with 4D people, like the good old days :)
41) Meeting long lost cousins and second cousins, C, J, J, J, J and J. LOL no kidding, they're five different people.
42) Express Camp at the start of April! Group 6 and 8 ftw :D
43) S-TIP interview hahaha.
44) NEmation VI: AHS TJC-ians! We still rock :)
45) PW. Cats. 'Nuff said.
46) JTS at the super ex Jap place in town.
47) Marina Barrage 10 August with 4D people :D
48) NDP pre-show!
49) PN's ROM :)
50) Clar's departure to Aus :( but I met him again!
51) H1 Chinese A's.
52) PW OP.
53) CHEESE FONDUE in Interlaken.
54) TJ A Div Water Polo Finals!
55) Blood Donation Drive hahaha.
56) Buying Threadless tees for the first time.
57) AHSICC handover :)
58) Neuroscience talk at Science Centre in March with TJ people.
59) MURAL PAINTING with 4D and Ms F :D
60) 31 Dec, our self-professed FOOD DAY @Nex. Haato's chocobanana waffle, kfc, Four Seasons' Durian Crepe, bubble tea samples...
61) Bella and Cara!
62) iPad 2
63) The start of something new.
And it's only the beginning. Trusting God to direct our paths for 2012 and the years ahead. No, it's not the end of the world, cos only He knows when that is. So smile, and rejoice in the Lord, for with each brand new day, hope springs forth anew! †
You don't know what really affects you until it hits you like a bullet train. You hear it coming before you see it, and then it slams into you head-on before you even have time to react. The worse thing is that the people on the train, driver included, don't know how much impact they have made in your life in that single moment. You are simply tossed aside while the train zooms into the darkness of the tunnel, back into oblivion. You're changed forever, and no one on this world feels it except you.
You can't even mention this to anyone because it's a feeling you can't express in words. When someone bungee jumps for the first time, the experience can only be described as 'exhilarating' or 'super duper cool' but no one will really understand how it feels like until they actually experience it themselves. Likewise, the impact someone has made on you is imprinted in your heart. No other human knows how it's like.
And of course, the heart is used to feel, not to speak.
Humans try their best to express their emotions and convey messages across to each other but nothing is ever 100% accurate. It is simply accurate enough to allow humans to understand, based on past similar experiences, what each other is going through. No one (except God, of course) can ever fully understand the plight of another person simply because different people react differently to the same situations. Although we say 'I understand' because we really feel as if we do understand, who's to say that two people's emotion of 'happiness' is really exactly the same? Exactly the same magnitude, exactly the same effects, exactly the same feeling? We can't know for sure. Ever.
I sometimes wonder about the future and whether 30 or 50 years from now I'll look back on this point of my life and go, "What in the world were you thinking?!" Or perhaps I'll go, "Indeed, this was your defining moment." I don't know whether what I'm doing now is right. The feelings I feel about my situations, about others' situations, they are simply that. Feelings.
It's hard to understand a language with no words.
If you're reading this, hello. I just want you to know that whatever ideals or dreams you have, they have affected me. They have changed me. I have my own ideals and dreams too, just that perhaps it's not what you had in mind. I'm content with what God has given me and I'm trusting God for His direction for me, for us.
The question now would then be, "Can we agree?" I wonder. How do we get past this barrier? What you want, what I want... How do we balance this?
We are same but different.
As for now, all I can do and all I need to do is surrender my life to God. And I pray that you would too.
Truth is, human love is not even worthy to be a shadow of God's love for us.
I don't wish to sound cynical but then again, the truth always hurts. Our love is selfish, jealous and conditional. And that's not even the beginning of it all. The world's romanticized notion of love in fairytales and soap operas are simply figments of our imagination; we hope and wish love could be a simplistic, undefined term which always brings us that warm fuzzy feeling of joy.
But no.
This topic is highly debated and discussed, which is an irony in itself because human love is supposedly an unmeasurable feeling that cannot be penned down even by the world's greatest poets and authors.
We fail to accept that love here on this earth has its flaws - because the person who loves is imperfect. We always wish that love can conquer the cynicism of the world, but the fact is: human love is incapable of removing all fear and sadness simply because the giver of this love is incapable of being selflessly devoted to loving someone through thick and thin.
This is just a random musing which I will continue some time, somewhere. Yes, it's sketchy and brief and inconclusive but I cannot conclude on such a broad topic as this. Yet. I have to say that if you're looking for the meaning of true love or how to love someone perfectly, the world is the last place to look.
One thing stays true when everything else lies: God's Love for us.
In my weakness You are made Strong. Lord I surrender my whole life into Your hands; mould me into who You want me to be, and guide me in this narrow path. I'm hopeless without You, and I know only You can change me. Thank You so much for Your everlasting Love in which I have peace. I love You.
Friday, October 14, 2011
REVELATION. 12:55 AM
Wow, I'm back. After more than nine months. I don't know what brought me back here, perhaps it was the feeling of nostalgia, or perhaps it was the feeling of I'm-bored-but-I-don't-feel-like-sleeping. Whatever it is, I'm back for now.
The world has changed and social media has evoluted at rapid speeds. I barely know anyone who still uses blogspot anymore. Many have migrated to Tumblr (not me, however) and majority have migrated to Twitter (yes, me) where it's so much easier to update because 140 words isn't exactly a lot to think through. What I just typed will probably take up more than four tweets immediately. With smart phones it's really easier to just tweet and reply one another, which is why I think I'm actually slowly migrating away from Facebook as well (i.e. Stop posting statuses but still online there).
Life in JC has it's ups and downs and I don't wish to say this all here because if I did pause to reflect, I would be up till 6am and I wouldn't have completed half of what I wanted to say. I realise now that life's too packed to cram into one blog post every nine months. It's impossible to express yourself in words anymore; some feelings are just meant to stay within us, for us to learn, for us to remember and for us to - in some cases - forget.
I'm going to end this rather abruptly because I don't have time to finish this (well, that's one thing that hasn't changed) and there's school later today. And I must end by saying that as we search for the meaning of life, remember that brevity is the essence of this world, and everything will soon fade away.
Everything except His Word.
So I will stay strong, I will build my life on His solid foundation.
Thank You.
Till the feeling comes; Kelly
/ THE SPECIAL ONE.
KELLY.
proud to be a CHRISTIAN
YSHPSAHSTJC
Y1F07; 2D08; 3D09;4D10!RojakClass
Ynetball. CP/art.INFOCOMM!
LOVES.
YHILLSONG | PLANETSHAKERS | DAVID ARCHULETA | SAM TSUI | DANNY GOKEY | THE FRAY | JASON MRAZ | DAUGHTRY | CHRIS TOMLIN
YTIMO BOLL | DIMITRIJ OVTCHAROV | LIN DAN | LEWIS HAMILTON | BOONSAK PONSANA | PETER GADE
Y24 | THE CLOSER | HEROES | THE MENTALIST | WLIIA | FRINGE | BIG BANG THEORY | COVERT AFFAIRS | QI
YHISTORY | BIOLOGY.
WANTS.
to glorify GOD.
to save as many people as possible (:
to draw closer to Jesus!
you and your family to be saved.
good grades
to learn Spanish & German
to travel USA & EUROPE.
a blessed J2 year :) L1R5 6 - close enough. an awesome J1 year! a rocking Sec 4 year! a rocking sec 3 year! to get to the Final Assessment of NWSP 09! TOP 10 FOR NEMATION IV! :D
theMATERIALISTICS.
Matthew Reilly's books
CHERUB: Shadow Wave
Henderson's Boys
BOND: Hurricane Gold
a wide angle (14mm?) or zoom lens
Danny Gokey's album :D Call of Duty: World at War a domokun tix for AVIVA Open Singapore! :D tix for LN SG OPEN! David A's album! Breadou :DROCKBAND 3 Set! David A's 2nd album :D DSLR POF- Necropolis
Just watched Nandito Ako (in two days) and I really like it. The song is really emotional and this is the best video which has translation and nice pictures (haha); the only bad thing is that it's live and there're fans cheering in the background. The studio version is of course more heartfelt. But still, great song by David Archuleta :) #DA2014!
Clocking in a post for 1 Jan 2012 although I have nothing much to say. I guess I'm supposed to list down my aspirations and resolutions for the year ahead, but there's not much point, really. After all, no one really knows whether you stick to them or not. It's between God and me, so I'll keep it in my heart :)
Anyway I just want to start the year off with the verses that inspire me a lot. There are many in the Bible of course, but these are those that I confess by mouth and always remember, cos when I claim them I just feel a sense of peace. It's hard to describe, but such is a relationship with God. Indescribably peaceful and joyful :)
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4:6-7
My favourite verse since primary school and I say this before exams, when I'm jittery, basically any time when I need peace (all the time, really). And trust me (even if you don't, trust God above all), it works.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose."
- Romans 8:28
This is good for the times where God puts you in a situation you don't think you can handle, or you dislike. Before you start to question God's plans for your life, remember that He's putting you through everything for His purpose, because He loves you. And there is always Hope in Him.
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." "
- Jeremiah 29:11
This is such an awesome promise from God. It ties in with Romans 8:28 as well! So if you think you're going through life in the dark, remember that the brightest Light is with you, and He can see every single step in front of you before you even take it. How brilliant is that? You can't fall, you can't get hurt, because He promises prosperity and not harm, hope and not despair :)
"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
- Isaiah 40:31
AHS' school verse! And over the four years there I've learnt to really appreciate it. I like the fact that it's in the hall so when we take major exams I can look at it, confess it, and calm myself down. It reminds us that God always grants us strength to face any challenge. We are weak alone, but as long as we hope and trust in Him, we are strong. Oh what joy we have in Him :)
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
- 2 Timothy 1:7
Clarissa introduced this verse to me in 2010 I think. And it has stuck with me since then. It gives me courage in times of worry. Fear is the devil's trap. We don't need to fall into it, because God has given us His Holy Spirit to conquer that trap (and all the others of the world) :D
And of course, there's Psalm 23, which I'm trying to memorise fully. I admit I like to mix the different versions together so it's a mix of KJV, NLT, NIV and all but at the end of the day, it is the Word of God, and it's power remains equally brilliant. The KJV one is nice, but the 'thou's and -eths are quite unfamiliar. So I'll just type out the one I remember, which is a mix.
The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures: he leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul: He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His Name's sake.
Yes, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.
King David was a man after God's heart. As Christians today, what is our purpose? What do we seek? We ought to seek God first, because without Him our life is a purposeless.
In 2011 I learnt to confess the Lord's Prayer and Jabez' Prayer daily in the morning before the day starts, because I believe it opens our hearts to receive His blessings, at the same time let Him take control of our lives. And it has changed me - it has made me less paranoid and controlling, and more humble and submissive.
So this is the end of the beginning. It only gets better from here :)
So this is the beginning of the end. The end of 2011, that is.
This year is going to be a little different, because I'm going off to Changi Village to countdown with my relatives later, so I can't post this at 2359. Well anyway it doesn't really matter because the end of 2011 may be a milestone for all of us, but it is simply a day in the grand scheme of things. God's blessings will continue to flow abundantly, and I believe He has greater things in store for us in the many years ahead :)
So I just want to start by saying that I have survived this year and even enjoyed it, through God's grace alone. I would never have survived those trying periods during exams, PW and mood swings had it not been for His unfailing Love. Yes, I admit there were many times I failed to understand His plans and I questioned His motives, and for that I am deeply sorry. At the end of the day, when I look back at my childish worries and fears, I realise that God's Love encompasses them all. As in 1 Peter 5:7,
"Cast all your cares upon Him, for He careth for you." (KJV)
And Scott Wesley Brown's song, He Will Carry You, so aptly put it:
There is no problem too big God cannot solve it
There is no mountain too tall He cannot move it
There is no storm too dark God cannot calm it
There is no sorrow too deep He cannot soothe it
If He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders
I know my brother that He will carry you
If He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders
I know my sister that He will carry you
I like this song because it really reminds me that through all the problems and troubles, there's one person that never fails us: Jesus. He carried all our sin, all our pain, what more our little worries?
I want to thank God as well for all the prayers He heard, all my cries of desperation, all my tears. He heard them all, and He delivered me from the darkest depths. Okay it may sound rather exaggerated, and perhaps if you knew what challenges I faced, you might scoff and say that they could be easily overcome; however to me, there were many times I felt like giving up, many times I felt torn in making decisions. Yet I prayed, and God answered. Indeed, He was my only Hope. And I really must thank God for giving me the faith, no matter how little, to cling on to Him. To face the cross, and put the world behind me.
And now I really pray that with what little faith we have, we can continue to grow in the Lord. This faith can grow, like how a mustard seed grows into a huge tree that provides shade. Likewise, our faith grows from something so small, into a tree that is strong, that bears good fruit, that helps others, strengthens others and ultimately, bring others to Christ. Oh the joy we have in the Lord :)
Since I don't have the luxury of time to go into detail of every challenge that I faced (not that I wish to, or even remember them anyway), I shall move on to the part where I list down all the fun and enjoyable times I had in 2011. If I forget anything important, please tell me (whoever who actually reads this)!
2011:
1) 7 Jan: AHS Sec 4 batch of '10 PROM! :D And the Pinnacle with Lindy, Dexter and YH after that.
2) 7 Jan: I got a belated birthday gift :)
3) 10 Jan: O Level Results Day. God's plan for me unfolded, no regrets!
4) 13 - 15 Jan: Vietnam Trip (HCM) with my dad, Val, Dave and YH :) haha the foot massage, Cu Chi Tunnels, the seafood dinner, the manicure and shopping was fun!
5) 24 Jan: Vivo to celebrate YH's birthday at Sushi Tei, and to prepare Jacq's farewell stuff at B&J's.
6) 25 Jan: Sent of Jacq to Aus! :(
7) 26 Jan: Posting day, went to appeal to V just for the sake of appealing hahaha. Then SAF Yacht Club with Mary and YH and my dad.
8) 27 Jan - 8 Feb: CHAPTER 11 (Orientation) :D
9) 5 Feb: CNY celebration, and Bella joined us for the first time hahaha.
10) 11 Feb: CG Bonding Day at Geylang Serai. Then I fell sick :(
11) 14 Feb: Valentine's Day. Sick at home haha. Received sweet messages though :)
12) CG 04/11! Pleasantly surprised to know that Jo was in the same class as me. Rojak class ftw :)
13) 12 March: Sunset was beautiful.
14) 14 March: lak lao :P
15) 18 March: In The Highest Live Worship at Woodlands! Amazing praise and worship :)
16) 23 March: AHS Founder's Day aka 4D reunion!
17) 26 March: PSRP
18) 2 April: Someone's dengue :(
19) 13 May: TJChoir Wild Thinks Concert and the post-concert debate
20) Pre-U Sem 2011 (1st week of June)! TJ hosted and it was great fun being an SPF to Group 12. Met cool people there, and caught up with old friends like Pris!
21) 6 June: Switzerland, Austria & Czech Republic trip! :D FANTASTIC SUMMER, beautiful scenery, great food and especially the dessert.
22) JCTs LOL. Learning experience. God's grace alone, really.
23) F1 race just before Promos haha.
24) Malacca trip during Sept hols, lovely beach and resort :)
25) Promos. THANK YOU LORD.
26) Second. God's grace alone.
27) TIP at St Luke's Hospital (Nov-Dec), made new friends and colleagues. Learning experience indeed :)
28) OGL interview was crazy madness and embarrassing but God saw me through :)
29) Sports Enrichment thingy, rollerblading with Christy and Van and even swaveboarding with YY hahaha!
30) Bintan in Dec with family and Lydon, rocky ferries, jokes, buggies and nice sandcastle making.
31) IFC Exco '11/12.
32) LEO DSC 27-28 Dec!
33) Entry test for SRP and after that :)
34) Bio O training.
35) 22 April, Good Friday. God loves you, and we are blessed :)
36) Recess buddies, under the staircase people (Y)
37) Jap curry addicts!
38) Meeting Mr. Seng and enjoying his craziness.
39) PS3 and Rockband!
40) 22-23 Dec: Christmas gathering with 4D people, like the good old days :)
41) Meeting long lost cousins and second cousins, C, J, J, J, J and J. LOL no kidding, they're five different people.
42) Express Camp at the start of April! Group 6 and 8 ftw :D
43) S-TIP interview hahaha.
44) NEmation VI: AHS TJC-ians! We still rock :)
45) PW. Cats. 'Nuff said.
46) JTS at the super ex Jap place in town.
47) Marina Barrage 10 August with 4D people :D
48) NDP pre-show!
49) PN's ROM :)
50) Clar's departure to Aus :( but I met him again!
51) H1 Chinese A's.
52) PW OP.
53) CHEESE FONDUE in Interlaken.
54) TJ A Div Water Polo Finals!
55) Blood Donation Drive hahaha.
56) Buying Threadless tees for the first time.
57) AHSICC handover :)
58) Neuroscience talk at Science Centre in March with TJ people.
59) MURAL PAINTING with 4D and Ms F :D
60) 31 Dec, our self-professed FOOD DAY @Nex. Haato's chocobanana waffle, kfc, Four Seasons' Durian Crepe, bubble tea samples...
61) Bella and Cara!
62) iPad 2
63) The start of something new.
And it's only the beginning. Trusting God to direct our paths for 2012 and the years ahead. No, it's not the end of the world, cos only He knows when that is. So smile, and rejoice in the Lord, for with each brand new day, hope springs forth anew! †
You don't know what really affects you until it hits you like a bullet train. You hear it coming before you see it, and then it slams into you head-on before you even have time to react. The worse thing is that the people on the train, driver included, don't know how much impact they have made in your life in that single moment. You are simply tossed aside while the train zooms into the darkness of the tunnel, back into oblivion. You're changed forever, and no one on this world feels it except you.
You can't even mention this to anyone because it's a feeling you can't express in words. When someone bungee jumps for the first time, the experience can only be described as 'exhilarating' or 'super duper cool' but no one will really understand how it feels like until they actually experience it themselves. Likewise, the impact someone has made on you is imprinted in your heart. No other human knows how it's like.
And of course, the heart is used to feel, not to speak.
Humans try their best to express their emotions and convey messages across to each other but nothing is ever 100% accurate. It is simply accurate enough to allow humans to understand, based on past similar experiences, what each other is going through. No one (except God, of course) can ever fully understand the plight of another person simply because different people react differently to the same situations. Although we say 'I understand' because we really feel as if we do understand, who's to say that two people's emotion of 'happiness' is really exactly the same? Exactly the same magnitude, exactly the same effects, exactly the same feeling? We can't know for sure. Ever.
I sometimes wonder about the future and whether 30 or 50 years from now I'll look back on this point of my life and go, "What in the world were you thinking?!" Or perhaps I'll go, "Indeed, this was your defining moment." I don't know whether what I'm doing now is right. The feelings I feel about my situations, about others' situations, they are simply that. Feelings.
It's hard to understand a language with no words.
If you're reading this, hello. I just want you to know that whatever ideals or dreams you have, they have affected me. They have changed me. I have my own ideals and dreams too, just that perhaps it's not what you had in mind. I'm content with what God has given me and I'm trusting God for His direction for me, for us.
The question now would then be, "Can we agree?" I wonder. How do we get past this barrier? What you want, what I want... How do we balance this?
We are same but different.
As for now, all I can do and all I need to do is surrender my life to God. And I pray that you would too.
Truth is, human love is not even worthy to be a shadow of God's love for us.
I don't wish to sound cynical but then again, the truth always hurts. Our love is selfish, jealous and conditional. And that's not even the beginning of it all. The world's romanticized notion of love in fairytales and soap operas are simply figments of our imagination; we hope and wish love could be a simplistic, undefined term which always brings us that warm fuzzy feeling of joy.
But no.
This topic is highly debated and discussed, which is an irony in itself because human love is supposedly an unmeasurable feeling that cannot be penned down even by the world's greatest poets and authors.
We fail to accept that love here on this earth has its flaws - because the person who loves is imperfect. We always wish that love can conquer the cynicism of the world, but the fact is: human love is incapable of removing all fear and sadness simply because the giver of this love is incapable of being selflessly devoted to loving someone through thick and thin.
This is just a random musing which I will continue some time, somewhere. Yes, it's sketchy and brief and inconclusive but I cannot conclude on such a broad topic as this. Yet. I have to say that if you're looking for the meaning of true love or how to love someone perfectly, the world is the last place to look.
One thing stays true when everything else lies: God's Love for us.
In my weakness You are made Strong. Lord I surrender my whole life into Your hands; mould me into who You want me to be, and guide me in this narrow path. I'm hopeless without You, and I know only You can change me. Thank You so much for Your everlasting Love in which I have peace. I love You.
Friday, October 14, 2011
REVELATION 12:55 AM
Wow, I'm back. After more than nine months. I don't know what brought me back here, perhaps it was the feeling of nostalgia, or perhaps it was the feeling of I'm-bored-but-I-don't-feel-like-sleeping. Whatever it is, I'm back for now.
The world has changed and social media has evoluted at rapid speeds. I barely know anyone who still uses blogspot anymore. Many have migrated to Tumblr (not me, however) and majority have migrated to Twitter (yes, me) where it's so much easier to update because 140 words isn't exactly a lot to think through. What I just typed will probably take up more than four tweets immediately. With smart phones it's really easier to just tweet and reply one another, which is why I think I'm actually slowly migrating away from Facebook as well (i.e. Stop posting statuses but still online there).
Life in JC has it's ups and downs and I don't wish to say this all here because if I did pause to reflect, I would be up till 6am and I wouldn't have completed half of what I wanted to say. I realise now that life's too packed to cram into one blog post every nine months. It's impossible to express yourself in words anymore; some feelings are just meant to stay within us, for us to learn, for us to remember and for us to - in some cases - forget.
I'm going to end this rather abruptly because I don't have time to finish this (well, that's one thing that hasn't changed) and there's school later today. And I must end by saying that as we search for the meaning of life, remember that brevity is the essence of this world, and everything will soon fade away.
Everything except His Word.
So I will stay strong, I will build my life on His solid foundation.
